ALAN HUBBARD’S PUNCHLINES – 22.5.16
Joseph Parker, said to be the Anthony Joshua of the South Seas, duly became a mandatory challenger for the Londoners’ IBF world heavyweight title with a solid points defeat of Cameroon-born Frenchman Carlos Takam in New Zealand yesterday.
It was the 24-year-old unbeaten Kiwi’s 19th win and there are certainly parallels with Joshua, but one doubts the Olympic champion will be losing too much sleep. Parker,born in Samoa, showed plenty of aggression but was easily caught by the durable Takam, a more capable opponent than any of the 16 served up to Joshua so far.
Takam, found Parker’s nose a particularly easy target with his left jab but the more resourceful New Zealander managed to outbox him.
However, it could be a decent scrap. Parker has plenty of bottle, though he lacks a bit of stamina, but then, who knows, so might Joshua?
It would be good to see two of the best young heavyweights in boxing get it on.
Tyson’s Trump card?
Is Tyson Fury boxing’s answer to Donald Trump, or is Trump a political version of Fury?
Both have a disturbing case of foot-in-mouth disease and will be best advised to keep their traps firmly shut before their upcoming big fights if they are to win friends and not become pariahs.
A debate on morals between fight fan Trump and Fury, who says he has no politics, simply religion, would be fascinating and certainly outrageous.
At least Fury has been forcibly reminded to keep his tongue in check after his latest verbal barrage followed by yet another apology. The Board of Control, I undertand, are less than happy with him –again- and he is on a final warning. He should take heed.
He continues to confuse, confound, to aggravate and get up people’s noses with more than just a left uppercut.
Not that Wladimir Klitschko appears fazed, either by Fury’s latest outpourings nor by the champion admitting he is way out of condition.
The Ukrainain is wily enough to realize Fury is playing mind games and word from his camp is that he was deeply embarrassed at abjectly surrendering his long-held belts to Fury and that e will see will see a totally different Klitschko in Manchester – much more like the old Dr Steelhammer.
“I made a mistake, I lost, my attitude has changed, he says. “ Now I’m a challenger. It’s got to be a different fight. I’ve had enough time to reload and I will rebounce.”
He could be right. On the other hand Fury’s knowledge that the ageing Klitschko can be quickly intimidated may again be his trump card.
Tongue twister for Mark
Talking of tongues, let’s hope Queensberry’s regular MC Mark Burdis has his in training for Saturday week when he introduces Paul Butler’s opponent at the Echo Arena in Liverpool.
It is Petchbarngborn Kokietgym. Try saying that without giving the tongue a hernia.
And that’s just the shortened version. The 30-year-old Thai was born Karoon Jarupianlerd Petchbarngborn Sor Tanapinyo.
All together now…
And we thought the Leicester City owner Vichai Srivaddhanaprabha had a moniker and a half.
No doubt Burdis, an accomplished actor who was a child star a six and has appeared in Grange Hill, Eastenders and Only Fools and Horses, will cope after a few rehearsals, though he’d be advised not to have a few beers first.
Personally the only Thai mouthful I can manage is Tom Yam Soup.
The unkindest cut
Exactly 50 years ago this weekend 41,000 people streamed into Highbury to witness Muhammad Ali thwart a revenge bid by Henry Cooper, keeping his world heavyweight by opening a deep, jagged cut in the sixth round on the Londoner’s left eyebrow.
The crucial blow was typically Ali, a long punch grazing with the heel of the glove.
But ’Our ‘Enry’, blooied but unbowed, still emerged a hero and it is remarkable to consider that compared to today’s juggernaugts he weighed in at not much over 13 stones – and that with a couple of weights placed in his boots by manager Jim Wicks.
It is quite sad to see a young world champion looking so grossly overweight so close to the fight. He shouldn’t be worrying about what he weighs at this stage, he should be worrying about tactics, punch variety, angles, timings, rhythms, strategies – that’s what he should be focused on. Not dieting. But he’s going to have to worry about it – because he’s grossly overweight. I’d hate to see happen to him what happened to Buster Douglas.
David Haye expresses concern that Tyson Fury is fighting the flab before he fights Wladimir Klitschko.
You know what? Klitschko does not punch to the belly anyway, so he (Fury) can go in there with the biggest belly he wants and Klitschko won’t punch him there. It will be an interesting fight this time.
Why Lennox Lewis is less worried about the Gypsy Giant’s midriff bulge.
I’m on a mission. I will not look beyond Tyson Fury… You have to see it. Because there’s not going to be repetition. I’m not going to stand there, no, I will be present.
Dethroned Wladimir Klischko promises a sharp change of tactics in Manchester on July 9.
I’ve had it all my life: women shouldn’t be doing this, women shouldn’t be fighting. I get it every time I fight, tyhen people come up to me after they’ve seen me and go, ‘blimey, you can fight like a man’. They expect a woman not to be able to fight, but we can. And that’s what I see myself as doing whenever I get in the ring: changing people’s minds. It’s the best feeling in the world, that, changing people’s views.
GB’s Olympic lightweight prospect Chantelle Cameron on why she fights for women’s rights –and lefts- in the ring.
I’ve done capoeira. It’s good. You stand around in a circle clapping and singing and you practice like you’re playing, throwing kicks that are missing, doing cartwheels and different acrobatic moves. It makes you more rounded and agile.
Joe Joyce, who handsprings into the ring and hopes to succeed Anthony Joshua as a British super-heavyweight gold medalist this summer explains how the martial art discipline which combines elements of dance, acrobatics and music has helped his aglity.
She had a mean right jab and a wicked punch.
Three-times world champion Duke McKenzie admires the boxing technque of the Duchess of Cambridge after a sparring sessions with her and Prince William and Prince Harry (“who told me when he’s angry he likes to have a good box”) in aid of the mental health campaign Heads Together.
“I was a champion, and I’m training like one again.” Read what Mitchell Smith says about his future in the Big Interview tomorrow.